Thu, June 29th, 2006 - 11:24 am - By Gordon Basichis
We found this article on Chron.com
WORKING
Many workers rejoice at four-day weekendCopyright 2006 Houston Chronicle
WITH Independence Day falling on Tuesday this year, companies are wrestling with that pesky midweek holiday dilemma.
Should they force employees to come in to work on Monday when everyone else is at the pool? Or be a hero and give them an extra day off so they get an unexpected four-day weekend?
Dave Ferdman opted for the hero route.
The president and chief executive of CyrusOne, provider of off-site data center services, realized about a week ago that the Fourth fell on a Tuesday.
Ferdman, who has about about 50 employees, made a snap decision to proclaim it as an extra day off for all nonoperational employees. For those who earlier planned to take Monday off as a vacation day, they’ll get credit in their time-off bank of days.
“It’s great for morale,” said Ferdman, who said he’s received a surprising number of e-mails from employees who said they were thrilled with the news.
He also figures they’ll be more productive in the long run by spending the day with their families or friends rather than having to wedge a day of work in between the weekend and Independence Day. And employees aren’t the only ones who are looking forward to an extra day off. Ferdman is planning to spend Monday with his wife and three young children visiting friends in Conroe or Galveston — or maybe both.
Administaff employees greeted the news that they’d be getting Monday off with cheering and a standing ovation for Chairman and CEO Paul Sarvadi.
Monday holidays
The company typically gives an extra day off either during the week of Christmas or New Year’s, but since those holidays fall on Monday this year, the day before Independence Day was a good alternative, said Steve Arizpe, executive vice president of client services and chief operating officer.It also helped that many of the company’s clients were also taking the day off.
Locke Liddell & Sapp also decided to give its employees a long weekend when it became clear many of its clients wouldn’t be at the office either. And then there was the relaxation factor.
“We felt that because those with the firm work so sedulously, this could be an ideal respite period,” said Jeff Love, vice chairman of the management committee and managing director of the Houston office.
But for those clients who will still be slogging away at the office, the firm has made arrangements.
To take the sting out of working when everyone else isn’t, Locke Liddell will pay its nonexempt employees double time.
Advance planning
Many companies, especially smaller ones, made the decision to close Monday in the last couple of weeks after someone looked at the calendar.Dynegy, however, has had the day off planned since late last year.
We always find it gratifying when employers acknowledge there is after all a human side to life and cut their employees a well needed break. We are, beyond a doubt, the hardest working country in the world, and that extra day off for the July Fourth Holiday weekend means so much in planning trips.
Smarter employers know that there is never much to be gained by trying to wring that last bit of effort from their employees, especially when insisting they work the interim day of a major holiday weekend will only cause unrest and frustration. The end result is that very little gets accomplished anyway since most workers have their minds on getaways and barbecues and firework displays.
So we salute those employers who know enough to know the difference and who subsequently make a difference by making the holiday a whole lot brighter. And needless to say, when they do come back to work and if you do need to hire more employees always spend a few bucks on a background check and Check Them Out Before They Hire.
Happy Fourth of July to one and all!
Wed, June 28th, 2006 - 4:37 pm - By Gordon Basichis
We found this article on the Jacksonville, Florida NBC Affiliate, WTLV Channel 12 First Coast News. One of those human sideshow mini-spectaculars that if it wasn’t true no one would believe you if you made it up.
Stalker Hides Under Woman’s Bed for Two Days
Reported by Jane Watrel, NBC
WASHINGTON D.C. — A stalker hid under a woman’s bed for two days — just for the chance to be alone with her. How he got the keys to her house is the scariest part, and it’s a serious reminder of the need to be cautious before handing over your keys.
The disturbing video shows the convicted stalker carefully hiding his video camera on a desk in the victim’s bedroom. When he hears the woman and her boyfriend come in the apartment, he disappears under her bed. Carlo Castellanos-Feria remained there for two days until he was discovered by the victim’s boyfriend.
“In a lot of ways, [it's the] stuff of an urban nightmare,” said Ken Wainstein, U.S. Attorney.
The nightmare started at Holy Cross Hospital where the victim met her stalker who was working as a parking valet. In court, the victim told the judge that the discovery of the valet in her bedroom was in her words — a horrible experience.
“Her life is dramatically changed. She is fearful when she hears strange noises she doesn’t know where they are coming from. Her husband, who was her boyfriend at the time of the incident, now has to be careful not to approach her from behind because it just startles her,” said Keri Barta, prosecutor.
Moments before he was sentenced, Castellanos-Feria apologized:
“I fell madly in love and that blinded my judgment. I beg your forgiveness.”
Judge Herbert Dixon handed down a three-year sentence, including treatment for mental illness and sex crimes. Court documents show the Hyattsville man had a change of clothes, condoms, a power cord and latex gloves with him under victims bed at the time of his arrest. He was a parking valet with an unnerving obsession.
“He got access to her keys. He then took that opportunity to get those keys copied. That’s something we should all think about next time we leave our keys somewhere,” said Ken Wainstein, U.S. attorney.
When investigators searched Carlo Castellanos-Feria’s home, they found vacation photos of his victim and a wedding video. Investigators later determined the items were stolen from her ex-husband’s home.
To call this story bizzarre is an understatement. However, it is living proof that these kind of incidents actually do take place in our less than perfect world and we should always be doing our best to protecct ourselves against them. Perhaps at the end of the day nothing says there is no better reason to perform a preemployment background check than a crazy story like this.
On one hand it is pretty funny, although I’m sure it was anything but to the poor woman who unwittingly hosted this man underneath her bed for a couple of days. There are certain questions about his personal maintenance under her bed, but propriety forbids that we ask.
Think insead of the liability factors that may well befall Holy Cross Hospital, the possible claims against that institution, and the obvious embarrassment. The former valet was convicted of criminal transgressions and now the civil litigation against Holy Cross is almost sure to come. Perhaps in its defense, the hospital can claim they ran a background check on Carlos Castellenos-Feria and there were no criminal records or reports indicating deviant behavior. Perhaps the hospital failed to run a background check and that’s where they become much more vulnerable to the liability issues. In any event, the whole affair is damaging to the image of what is otherwise a reputable hospital.
It is always wise to protect yourself. A few bucks up front for an employee screening can save you millions in the back end. So use this story as a lesson in human resources. Check them out before you hire.
Fri, June 23rd, 2006 - 1:31 pm - By Gordon Basichis
| We saw this article in Media Post Publications and thought the first part of it was a nice relief, like the Peruvian Pipes. The Consumer: Becomes the Entertainment |
We have been in New York on different occasions and also experienced anywhere from a sole player to an entire band playing pipes guitars, drums and tambourines. As the author claims, it is a nice respite from the drudgery of subway travel and all that you face when you reach your destination and go off the work. We remembered descending into one subway stop and finding a pair of identical twins, playing Peruvian music. One played guitar and the other the pipes, and since they were good looking gentlemen with long, dark shoulder length hair they attracted their fair share of women. Clearly, they were enjoying themselves, and just as clearly, as evidenced by their guitar case laden with bills and silver, they were making money. So in a sense, these subway troubadours and working to entertain our work force, or at least those who use subways and other forms of transportation. Whether these troubadours are legal or illegal immigrants is a concern for somoene else, since they do help us relax on our journey to work. Perhaps, in addition to the Pervian musicians we can use a few Irish bands, playing Celtic music, and samplings of other music from other parts of the world. We doubt seriously if these people will ever need background checks since technically they are among the self-employed. But if you are fotunate enough to be in a place where your workday begins with the lyrical sounds of Peruvian Pipes, consider yourself lucky. It will brighten up your day.
|
Thu, June 22nd, 2006 - 3:03 pm - By Gordon Basichis
We saw this article in the Los Angeles Times and thought if ever there was a universal pain point, this is sure it.
Few Workers Admit to Office Supply Theft
Only 1 in 5 U.S. workers admits to stealing items, but a survey’s authors say the true rate is higher.By Molly Selvin
Times Staff WriterJune 22, 2006
If you’re like most workers, you’ve probably taken pens, file folders, paper or other company supplies for your personal use.
But chances are, you don’t think that amounts to theft. You’re not alone.
A survey released Wednesday showed that 1 in 5 U.S. workers admitted to stealing company office supplies in the last year. But even the survey’s authors acknowledged that the true rate of pilfering was much higher.
Some employees, workplace experts say, won’t cop to stealing because they don’t think what they are doing is theft. Others simply think that theft is justified, and they see their bosses doing it all the time.
A worker who grabs a ream of paper to print an office report on his home computer doesn’t think he is stealing, said Brent Short, managing director of Spherion Corp., a Fort Lauderdale, Fla.-based staffing firm that commissioned the survey of 1,600 employees nationwide. Eighteen percent admitted to stealing.
An employee who takes a can of coffee from the office kitchen might justify it on productivity grounds.
“He figures, ‘I don’t have time to pick up coffee but I won’t be any good tomorrow at work if I don’t have it,’ ” Short said.
Some employees consider office supplies a fringe benefit of the job, said John Case, a Del Mar, Calif., security consultant.
Other workers are following their bosses’ lead, said Karla Kretzschmer, a Michigan-based human resources consultant.
“When leaders use company cars for personal errands or get the office tech staff to set up their home computer, it’s no longer as black-and-white,” she said.
The problem is more pervasive among workers between the ages of 18 and 29, according to the survey. Nearly a quarter of those younger employees admitted raiding the supply cabinet, compared with 13% of workers 50 and over.
Mark Mehler, co-founder of CareerXroads, a New Jersey-based consulting firm, believes that younger workers are just more willing to admit to pilfering.
But Paul Harrington, who teaches economics at Northeastern University, contends that “kids working at low wages don’t have much at stake if they get caught stealing. They’ll just move to another job.”
What do employees take?
“Anything that’s not bolted down,” said Short, who has observed seasonal patterns to office theft. “Around the holidays every tape dispenser in the office disappears because people are wrapping presents.”
And in a couple of months, pens and pencils will fly off the shelves as parents restock their children’s school backpacks.
A friend our ours who has been a key executive in the apparel industry for more than a couple of decades told us that a signicant percentage of your work force is stealing on a regular basis. There is also a percentage when made aware of the unchecked pilgerage will start to resent the employer for not taking appropriate actions. be aware of the stealing but would not steal themselves. This percentage, when aware of unchecked pilgerage will start to resent the employers for not taking action. Others, who normally wouldn’t steal may even begin to follow suit. In all, pilferage can affect the morale and self-esteem of your honest workers.
The thing is if were only the pencils and tape they were stealing, you may be well ahead of the game. Sure, these items are costly, but more than a few computers have been smuggled out the door, over the years. If your business is one of tangible goods, like the fashion industry, most certainly your inventory is vulnerable to theft. You may not know it, but you could have a partner or two who sells your goods at the local Swamp Meet, or off a truck.
Not only are hard goods being stolen, but so is all sorts of proprietary information, from your customers lists to the specs on the new whatever is you have spent years and millions in research and development. Let’s face it, there are more than a few unscrupulous companies out in this world who realize that stealing developing technology and proprietary informaiton is a lot cheaper than develping it yourself. For these unscrupulous companies, They realize it is a lot easier to steal your new technology or proprietary information that it is to conduct their own research and development. Research and development can cost millions and take years to complete. Stealing is fast and highly cost effective. it’s just a matter of getting in touch with the wrong guy in right place.
The article attests that maybe one in five adults admit to stealing office supplies. This is just pens and scotch tape we are talking about. You can only imagine the secrecy involved in moving expensive electronics or large quantities of inventory out your back door. Sometimes it is an individual, and sometimes it is an entire ring of thieves. More often that you would imagine, the ring is organized by one of your more trusted employees.
All theft is bad. Theft of electronics and inventory is worse. Someone stealing your intellectual property or propretary informaiton can prove disasterous. Not only does such theft threaten to deep six your entire business Employee theft is statistically the major cause of businesses going under.
With theft you can lose thousands of dollars in supplies. But you can also lose inventory, proprietary and intellectual property and see your insurance premiums increase to very unconfortable levels. And then, if you are lucky enough to catch the thieves, you may have to fire, rehire, retrain until you are burdened with a never ending cycle.
Considering the potential losses, it is small wonder we urge people to conduct background checks on everyone in their workforce. You not only avoid costly theft, but the liabilities concerning work place violence and sexual harrassment, substance abuse, can prove almost insurmountable. Your HR people can conduct a fairly thorough employee screening for anywhere from $30 to $100. That’s pretty cheap price for the advantage of knowing what you are brining into your work force. It just makes sense.
Go to our website and check out some of the statistics we have posted for you. Think about what you would be gaining by conducting a background check. Think about what you have been missing, like inventory and office supplies, if you don’t.
And then Check Them Out Before You Hire.
Tue, June 20th, 2006 - 1:38 pm - By Gordon Basichis
Fed up with HR?
Let someone else handle it. Professional employer organizations let you hand off the headaches and focus instead on your business.
From: Inc. Magazine, May 2006 | By: Max Chafkin
Peter McCann’s HR troubles started in 2001, when a former employee filed a complaint alleging that Ideal Images, McCann’s Omaha-based screen printing and embroidery company, fired her because of her race. McCann and his entire staff were questioned by investigators from the state’s Equal Opportunity Commission, and the investigation dragged on for several stressful weeks. The complaint was eventually dismissed, partly because the worker’s replacement was also a minority, but the thought of another discrimination charge frightened McCann, who began to obsess over everything from background checks to performance evaluations…
In October 2004, McCann ran into an acquaintance, Mike Mapes, who said he could make McCann’s HR woes go away immediately. Mapes is CEO of Alliance Group, an Omaha-based professional employer organization, or PEO. Such firms place most or all of a client’s work force on their payrolls, assuming responsibility for benefits, paychecks, and other HR functions and essentially becoming the company’s HR department. McCann signed up three months later. Alliance now handles all of Ideal’s HR issues, from workplace safety to payroll administration. Thanks to the PEO, McCann has begun to offer a 401(k) plan and flexible spending accounts. Even better, because Alliance oversees the benefits of 2,000 employees at 92 companies, it is able to negotiate better deals with benefits providers than McCann could on his own. “It really comes down to knowing that my HR is buttoned up,” he says…
PEOs have been around for years but, until recently, most administered only basic payroll services and benefits programs. Over the past few years, however, the industry has undergone a makeover, partly in an effort to regain credibility following several well-publicized bankruptcies. Many PEOs now behave much like consultants, helping clients tap into the latest health benefits and comply with complex labor regulations related to discrimination and workplace safety. PEOs are becoming one-stop shops for business owners eager to outsource all of their HR functions and focus instead on their core business…
The new breed of PEOs caters primarily to companies with between five and 100 employees–both white collar and blue collar. Most charge a fee per employee or pocket a percentage of a client’s total payroll. Prices vary but typically amount to between 2 and 4 percent of a company’s payroll. PEOs make the most sense for business owners who can’t afford a dedicated human resources staff and don’t have time to handle day-to-day HR ..
One drawback to partnering with a PEO is that HR becomes far less personalized. But for McCann, it’s still better than before, when he was too distracted to offer much help anyway, he adds. After deciding to make the switch, he explained to his staff that the arrangement with the PEO would allow Ideal to offer better benefits with almost no effect on the company’s bottom line. “It was an easy sell,” he says.
Max Chafkin shares his thoughts on professional employer organizations at www.inc.com/podcasts.
Resources
For more information on PEOs, visit the website of the National Association of Professional Employer Organizations, which has guidelines for selecting a PEO and a list of accredited PEOs that are insured against bankruptcy.
A PEO is more viable an option for some compaies than others. We believe this is certainly one of many areas where outsourcing is a sensible alternative to in-house departments. Aside from the more obvious benefits of cost and space reduction, in your outsourcing a PEO you are not necessarily shipping more jobs out of the country. PEO’s, by and large, are domestically based and comprised of highly experienced professionals. The better ones assure their personnel are accessible to clients in need of insights and professional information.
We at Corra have seen where sometimes the PEO tends to administer by rote, rather than press itself or more innovative methods. We found in certain cases where liaison was less capable of picking up on the nuances of a given situation, so that her perspective was less imaginative and less flexible than we would have desired. As with most situations of this sort, your outsource will always prioritize the covering of their butts, before they grow too concerned with covering yours.
It pays to explore the advantages and disadvantages of a PEO and determine if it is a match with your own corporate culture. More “family” type cultures may find outsourced HR services awkward and even intrusive. Others may find the impersonal aspects highly desirable. Perhaps the defacto neutrality of the PEO will do more to instill trust among employees and to avoid antagonisms. Companies vary, and so should their choices.
No matter what, however, we at Corra suggest you always conduct background checks on your new personnel and, in certain instances, on your current employees. Employee screening is very important and the best way to curtail a good share of potential liability claims. If you hire a PEO, ask if they offer background checking services.
Always remember, Check Them Out Before You Hire.
Mon, June 19th, 2006 - 2:03 pm - By Gordon Basichis
We saw this article on the WLOX TV website for Biloxi, Mississippi. The article orginated from the Christian Science Monitor and deals with that old perennial teenage summer employment.
Special from CSMonitor.com
Summer Job Forecast: Cloudy
By Matt Bradley | Correspondent of The Christian Science Monitor
Jasmine Blocker has reached an impasse in her job hunt. After weeks of pounding the pavement, the 19-year-old Chicago native still hasn’t found employment for the summer, and her applications have gone unanswered. Without a job, and with a child of her own to take care of, Ms. Blocker is growing frustrated.
“Now that I’m at my wit’s end, I’m looking for any job. Restaurant, retail, anything. I think that’s what it is - a lack of experience,” she says. “Maybe people have had one or two jobs, but I’ve only had one.”
Blocker is mired in one of the more common pitfalls faced by the millions of teenagers searching for jobs each summer: the Catch-22 of employment experience. Companies are reluctant to hire teens with little or no work history. But without a job to prove themselves, young people lack the experience necessary to jump-start a career.
Seasonal job applicants have always faced this chicken-and-egg challenge, and this year may offer little relief from that cycle. According to labor analysts, the job market for young people this summer will be nearly as austere as over the past several years, despite an upswing in employment numbers in the overall labor market.
“The last few summers saw some of the lowest teen employment rates in history,” says Joseph McLaughlin, a research associate at the Center for Labor Market Studies at Northeastern University and one of the authors of an annual summer teen job-market report. They predict an employment rate of 37.4 percent for the summer of 2006 - marking only a slight improvement over last year’s 36.8 percent.
The continuing job stagnation for teens comes at a time when their priorities seem to be shifting. Nearly 36 percent of teens cited a need to save money for college as the top reason for working this summer, according to the annual Junior Achievement Interprise Poll of nearly 1,500 teens published in May. Until this year, most teens had listed a need for spending money as their primary reason for seeking work.
“They’re kind of seeing a more purposeful need to work,” says Darrell Luzzo, senior vice president of education for JA Worldwide in Colorado Springs, Colo. “They know that because of the high cost of tuition and fees … their parents will be reluctant to offer spending money,” he says.
The prolonged lull in the summer labor market this decade is a surprise. During the decades after World War II, teenage employment followed a fairly consistent pattern. Teen hiring prospects rode on the outside of America’s cyclical employment curve. During recessions, older workers would settle for the lower-skilled jobs normally awarded to teens and less- experienced applicants. “It wasn’t surprising that [teens] were hit so hard by [the recession of] 2001,” Mr. McLaughlin says. “What was surprising is that their recovery has been very slow.”
The article goes on to give teens helpful tips in finding and securiing jobs. There is mention of a website www.teens4 hire.org that posts jobs and tips for teens looking for work.
The article claims it is the increase in the teenage population that is responsible for teens having difficulty in find a summer job. What we found most curious is that there is no mention of outsourcing where at least some of the jobs have been shipped off to foreign countries. Even the purveyors of the oft quoted quip , “You want fries with that?” have been downscaled at least now that most orders are processed through a phone bank from anywhere but here.
More than the actual and sad reality of a teenager being less able to make his spending money, yet alone save for college, perhaps we are denying our youth and even greater lesson. We are denying them an ability to experience the work ethic at a formative age. Clearly, not working too often leads to too much idle time for kids, which can translate into drugs, foolishness, apathy and trouble. it is a bad precendent to create an environment where a teenager is denied the ability to measure his worth in even the limited market place. He is not only denied the measurement of his own value, but the ability to learn how to work well with others. Even in the most menial jobs, there are myriad skills a young person will polish. If nothing else, he or she will learn better communications skills and the best approach to dealing with the public.
It is a shame, really, that we are curtailing the growth of our own teens. It is also one more place where we are actually short changing ourselves in quest of a more attractive bottom line. But then what is the true bottom line? A few dollars or a more accountable and competent work force?
Since Corra specializes in pre-employment background checks, it is always nice to know that we will enjoy a large and vital emerging work force in the years to come. We would hope that our nation’s youth wouldn’t have to crawl its way into our more basic jobs. There is, after all, a certain rite of passage for a young person to be serving sandwhiches or working in a retail shop. Or starting his own software company. (just kidding.) But we don’t kid about the rite of passage and the sense of responsibility that come with it.
It would be a shame that in the name of greed that is far too often disguised as expediency we nullify our youths’ introcution into the workforce. This, too, will have evident fall out. Kids will remain dependent on their parents for spending money. They will not be able to save for school. And their parents, already strapped for cash, will be forced to dig even deeper or go further into debt in order to shell out allowance and to put their kids through college.
So, as with many other things, there are more than the simple ramifications associated with outsourcing. There are certain complexities enveloping the issue. There are always other things to consider. To create a system that essentially deprives our kids from finding work can lead to consequences we in our short sightedness cannot imagine.
Wed, June 14th, 2006 - 3:25 pm - By Gordon Basichis
According to the PR people at Colgate Palmolive, speed dating is all the rage in New Zealand. We found this article in Scoop Independent News.
Dating frenzy hits New Zealand
Dating frenzy hits New Zealand
News release
June 14, 2006Dating frenzy hits New ZealandIt’s a dating frenzy! The singles scene is alive and kicking up its heels in New Zealand going by the response to the Colgate® Max Fresh™ Speed Dating Challenge.
The organisers have been swamped, registrations outnumbering by over three to one the places available at New Zealand’s speed dating ‘date-off’.
Event coordinator Gabrielle Squires of Colgate-Palmolive® Ltd says the rush for places at both the North and South Island functions has meant the organisers are going to close entries earlier than expected (at midnight, Friday, June 16).
“Prospective suitors have registered from far and wide – from as far away as Kapiti and Wanganui for Auckland and Wanaka and Invercargill for Christchurch,†Ms Squires says.
“We’ve got room for 50 men and 50 women at each venue but as of today (June 14) registrations are at almost 700, so we are moving forward the closing date by two days.â€
It’s good to see so many zealous New Zealanders want to compete for most popular man and woman. It is kind of like high school, but with a lot less guile and the chance to win prizes. If you are the former prom queen or king then you pretty much now how this works. The most popular out manuever the most gifted for the gifts.
Top prize is a trip for two to Queensland, a surfboard, and a microwave oven. Just kidding about the oven. Who cooks, anyway? Even if it is only mcrowave. You can also win ski passes and restaurant vouchers, all in exchange for the chance to get next to someone you might find attractive and at least of modicum of your self-esteem.
Maybe the more heady contestants train by hitting on potential dates in parks and cafes, or the even the supermarket checkout line to work on that right combination of charm and speed.
We don’t know if speed daters or their respective agencies conduct background checks, but given the hurried atmosphere and the brief encounter, it may make sense to find out if the person you just met is a former axe murderer, or the kind of guy who thinks of you as a financial partner, even long after he has stolen your identity.
Well, lest we be wet blankets, we wish them luck in Kiwi Land. In three minutes, the time allotted ofr each “dating” session, you are bound to find the person of your dreams.
Mon, June 5th, 2006 - 5:16 pm - By Gordon Basichis
Can You Really Make Out In Ninety Seconds? Or Is It Just One More Way of Killing Time?
“A fellow will remember a lot of things you wouldn’t think he’d remember. You take me. One day, back in 1896, I was crossing over to Jersey on the ferry, and as we pulled out, there was another ferry pulling in, and on it there was a girl waiting to get off. A white dress she had on. She was carrying a white parasol. I only saw her for one second. She didn’t see me at all, but I’ll bet a month hasn’t gone by since that I haven’t thought of that girl.†–From Mr. Bernstein, as played by Everett Sloane in “Citizen Kane.
We have all stood in a checkout line and wrestled with the merits of chatting up a person we found so utterly attractive. Most likely, you did a little time assessment, calculating how long it would before it was her turn at the cashier and then out the door and gone from your life. Forever. With each ticking second your anticipation grew as you weighed the odds of success versus the usually greater odds of rejection and the added embarrassment of looking like a jerk.. Should you go for it and risk making as ass of yourself? Or would you end up like poor Mr. Bernstein, lamenting into his old age about the girl that might have been?
Okay, you probably just stood there and didn’t take the risk, letting inaction dictate your destiny. Let’s face it, if we were truly made of hardier stuff, we would always be taking greater risks. But if you did decide to pursue your impulses you are indeed the rare one. You are a romantic kamikaze.
Well, now with the advent of Speed Dating you hitting on a potential companion is not as risky a proposition. You get the entire thrill of making a good impression quickly, but in a user friendly environment. In some ways it’s like going trout fishing in stocked pond. Nevertheless, it is no secret that Speed Dating is popular all over the world,. Among other places, there are Speed Dating services throughout the United States, the U.K., Western Europe, Australia, and even South Africa.
Speed Dating was founded by a Rabbi Yaacov Deyo in 1999. The idea was established to keep young Jewish singles from seeking their paramours outside their religion. Since then it has expanded well beyond the bounds of its Jewish tradition and has been adopted by different religious and secular groups alike. It is a quick way for people to get to know each other on a fundamental basis. Or at the very least it’s a great way to avoid blind dates and fix ups from your mother and pitying friends. Most speed dating services plan, overall, anywhere from sixty to ninety minutes sessions.
For the five people out there who still may not know how Speed Dating works, here is the general idea. Speed Dating agencies organize events at fun but relaxing places. They invite equal numbers of each sex, hand them a name tag or ID number and a scorecard. Couples are paired up for a pre-allotted amount of time, with the idea that couples get to know each other on a basic level. A whistle blows and you discreetly mark down whether you are interested in seeing that person again. You then move on to the next prospect, and follow the same process, until you run through the gamut of prospects.
You then submit your card to the Speed Dating service, and if the person you want to see also wants to see you, they arrange for the hook up. You then move on to traditional dating with the general idea being you are attempting to form a serious relationship rather than a hot night and a tallyho until the next speed dating session comes to a theater near you.
Does it work? Some say it does, and some say it doesn’t. They say about half come away with a potential match. Whether this is a result of genuine attraction or a means of justifying the money you laid out for a Speed dating session is anyone’s guess. However, the odds of finding someone can’t be any worse than your usual blind date or what you can drag from a bar.
Speed Dating advocates claim most people can tell if someone is their kind of person in the first thirty to ninety seconds of meeting them. Skeptics argue that often the first impressions do not always tell the entire tale and that makes people prone to rash decisions. They say sometimes you need more time to find the things you would have in common. Then again, some people spend a lifetime together to find out they never did have much in common.
Perhaps the greatest controversy in the speed dating circuit and among the different purveyors of the service is determining the correct number of minutes prospects should spend with each other before moving on to the next potential love interest. Orthodox believers in the first impression think ninety seconds to three minutes is probably enough time to schmooze and choose. Others argue six to ten minutes is the proper time allocation for preliminary courtship. General consensus is each “date†should be at least six minutes but not more than eight.
The trade off of course is quantitative versus qualitative. If you spend less time with one person, you don’t get to learn as much about them. But then you can cram more “dates†into the allocated session. That translates into an even greater selection of people you don’t get to know all that much about.
Then again, if you spend more time with one person, there are fewer prospects to look forward to over the course of the night. Perhaps that helps you really focus in on the ones you have before you. Focus, however, is not always a good thing, especially when the person sitting across from you is either boring or obnoxious. Then you start longing for the bygone days of shorter “dates.â€
I watched a speed dating session on TV. As with football and politics, armchair insights on speed dating may imbue one with the illusion of a sharper perspective. The literal and figure objective distance may also provide keener perception on the quirks and foibles of the engaging parties. For me, I was struck by the repetition of the opening line, which was without fail, “What do you do?â€
Perhaps there is no better opening than “What do you do?†Perhaps it helps qualify like no other phrase in this world. But when I heard “What do you do?†become a relentless refrain I couldn’t help but wonder if there wasn’t another way to break the ice. But then in the opening act of the twenty first century we as a general civilization are not much regarded for our originality and witty banter. Culturally speaking, we are a long, long way from the Algonquin and far too close too seventh grade.
I could be called to task for even noting this, if it had not been for the bemused looks on the “daters’†faces as they were forced to repeat the same question—“What do you do?†I could see by contestant number three they were starting to get a little numb, and unless Mr. or Miss Terrific came along pretty soon nothing was about to rouse them from their reverie. After awhile I stared hoping that magic would strike, that chemistry of instant attraction or, better, love at first sight. It was just another guy with a breath mint.
Because it was being taped for TV show some of the daters were interviewed. Some claimed they found a genuine prospect. Others mumbled something about possibilities. Some lied. But even the most optimistic, their voices and body language betrayed their true emotions. It was an okay experience, they allowed, but you could tell they were vaguely disappointed. But remember, this was but one session on one TV show. Maybe being on television roused greater expectations.
Well, like it or not, speed dating is growing more popular with each passing and disappointing weekend. There is all sorts of ancillary information as in what to wear and how to behave. For dress,most suggest Khakis or dress slacks for men, with a nicely pressed sports shirt. For women, the sites suggest everything from business gear to jeans, but warn against anything too revealing. Most sites offer gentle reminders about hygiene and good grooming, suggesting showers, clean hands and clipped fingernails. Keep the perfumed scent down so they don’t smell you coming nor remember you a day after you left. This goes for men and women.
Frankly, no matter whom you meet and what the speed dating services promise in terms of character and stature, it always pays to run a background check on anyone you don’t know and are thinking of dating. If you are a single parent, it is even that much more important to make sure who you bring into your house is not more interested in your kids than they are in you. There are many scumbags out there of one sort or another, and online dating and other modern dating services give them more access to you, not less.
That said, speed dating seems harmless enough and a good way to spend the night. It is a bit like gambling, where instead of seeing if you can win any money you are betting on romance. And like gambling it is probably fun to do now and then, but not too often. I would think frequent speed dating would cause all those names and faces to appear more like conjured spirits than hopeful prospects.
As for its bottom line merits, like most romantic pursuits there is no bottom line. Like beauty, it belongs in the eyes of the beholder. If you are successful in finding someone worth dating, then it is an exhilarating experience, I’m sure. If you met no one, then it’s another rotten waste of time. But let’s face it, if you are anywhere north of twenty one you have already found a thousand different ways to waste time. So what’s one more?
Besides, with speed dating you can polish your skills for your short game. You can be a formidable romantic when time is short and the desire is high.
You should be hell on wheels in the supermarket checkout line.